Family, Friends and Even Mentors:
Are They On Your Side
Part 1
by
Judith Sherven, Ph.D. and James Sniechowski, Ph.D.
© 2007
"Keep away from people who
try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that,
but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become
great."
~ Mark Twain
The problem is Twain didn't say how
to identify those people who "belittle your ambitions". . .
OR how to stay away from those people
without being rude or creating emotional earthquakes in your
business, with your family or with "friends."
So, we'll prepare you to take a close
look at how you can spot those people who don't truly have your best
interests at heart.
Now, you might think this would be
easy.
BUT that ignores the pervasive and
commonplace abusive behavior that's endorsed in our culture.
If you doubt this, take a look at
what parades around on the media:
 |
TV commercials that center around
men being put down by women, women being put down by men
|
|
Sit-coms with key characters
routinely the butt of jokes or set up to take a fall
|
|
Stand-up comedy based on hostile
characterizations of events, individuals, behaviors, groups of
people, etc. |
|
Advice shows, where radio
callers/TV guests receive dictatorial demands, and when they
don't immediately agree, they get the brush-off |
|
Religious shows dominated by
angry ministers threatening their congregation/viewers with hell
and damnation |
|
News shows as showcase for the
hosts' abrasive attitudes and personal vendettas rather than
actual news service |
But what about ordinary, daily life?
On a regular basis, you can observe
mistreatment of children on city sidewalks and in grocery store
aisles . . . adults yanking and shoving kids, screaming at them, and
too often exhibiting
hatred at ever having had the children in the first place.
We could go on and on with examples,
but having said all that . . . it can be very easy to ignore the
subtle dig from your buddy, the snicker from your Dad, the no-show
from your best friend at your office party or art opening, etc, etc,
etc.
What comes to mind when you think
about that?
Because that may be a lot to take in.
And since this is such a fundamental
issue in your availability to live a Fabulous Life . . . we'll wait
to continue this article next week.
At that time we'll cover what you
need to look for in your closest relationships to make sure you
aren't sabotaging your future by allowing undetected mistreatment.
To get ready, as you go through your
daily life, pay attention to the many ways you observe abuse around
you . . . from bad manners and subtle rudeness to out and out
mistreatment, whether emotional, verbal, or physical.
And if you've never noticed before,
you may want to keep a journal to help yourself pay attention.
....part 2 next month
Bestselling authors of four
relationship books, Judith Sherven, PhD and James Sniechowski, PhD
have redefined the future of weddings. From now on brides AND grooms
will be co-partners every step along the way. Be sure to read your
complimentary 2-chapter excerpt from their new book, "The Smart
Couple's Guide to the Wedding of Your Dreams." Just go to http://www.smartweddingcouples.com
Enjoy relationship information at
www.themagicofdifferences.com
For more information about Judith & Jim go to
www.thenewintimacy.com
To book Judith & Jim for a media appearance, corporate training, or
private
coaching contact them at
jimjude@direcway.com
